April 2022

The April club cruise will be the traditional circumlocution of Bainbridge Island with boats anchoring afterwards north of Lemolo (east side of Liberty Bay). Steve and Elsie on S/V Osprey will be cruise leaders. Please monitor VHF channel 69 for club communications.

• Dates: Saturday and Sunday, April 23-24, 2022

Race Rules:

1. The Office of Circumlocution is proud to present The OPENING DEBATES of the
   36th CIRCUMLOCUTION at 1000 hours, 23 April, 2022, on a line true west from
   the West Point lighthouse and east of the VTS lanes. The debates will be argued
   initially upwind from this line, then the Masters of vessels who have mangled the
   administration of issues may choose to sail either north or south. Boats heading
   north must leave the “SF” buoy on the far left as described below in Para 11, before
   heading to Agate Pass, and shall be prepared to discuss the possible effects of global
   warming. Boats heading south around Bainbridge Island have no marks and leave
   no traces. The determination of the most clueless administrators will be made under
   the power lines just past Keyport Naval Station and Underwater Weapons Research
   Center.
2. There will be three Platforms for Debate. 1) Smaller craft and gray double-enders
   under 38 feet LOA (former Trump Cabinet members who were or are subpoenaed).
   2) Half-fast, in mid-size craft (former administrators hoping to live in obscurity). 3)
   Larger and/or those who think they are really fast (former Cabinet members who
   claim the Biden administrators stole their cushy jobs).
3. The first platform will start at 1000, the second at 1015, and the third at 1030.
   Boats with more than one hull must wait 15 additional minutes for each additional
   hull. Please monitor VHF channel 69 for any club communication.
4. The Debates will be monitored by former Secretary of State Pompous Pompeo, who
   will come out of silent obscurity to sound a single long horn blast at each plank
   laying session except for the multiple hull boats. Protests must be registered in
   advance the night before with prospective Supreme Court Justice Brown Jackson.
5. Those vessels who have earned 2nd place in the past five years are not eligible for
   2nd place. They may, in the enduring tradition of politicians worldwide, obfuscate
   the discussion by coming in First, i.e., ahead of 2nd place.
6. The following are frowned upon and are grounds for public scorn:
   Failing to have at least one sail up starting and finishing.
   Use of internal combustion engine(s).
   Failing to sail the entire course on your bottom in your bottom.
   Failing to navigate the entire selected course.
   Failing to display a PSCC burgee.
7. The HIGHEST and MOST VALUED Award will be given for SECOND PLACE.
   First across will be nominated for Commodore for the 2022-2023 year.
8. An award will be given for the BEST HORROR D’HOOVER. Judgment will be by
   secret negotiations in the Raft-up described below.
9. An award will be given for PERSEVERANCE. To qualify the vessel must cross the
   Finish Line prior to 0001 hours on 24 April, 2022.
10. The Nominating Convention will be a Raft-up for all boats north of Lemolo.
    Powerboats with dance floors are encouraged to attend. The Raft-up will be the base
    of the HORRORS D’HOOVER Contest and the Awards Ceremonies.
11. As always, good candidates never travel in the middle of the nautical road. Cross
    the middle of the nautical road quickly. See DBT COMDTINST M16672.2 Rule 10
    (c). With regard to Buoy SF, you must stay east of the traffic lane until Buoy SF is
    past your beam before crossing to the west side. Chart plotters will be audited. Do
    not impede or force a WSF ferry or other large or government vessels in Rich
    Passage (considered a narrow channel) to stop or change course. Doing so will
    create hate and discontent amongst those who would rather see sailboats removed
    from local marine waters. See DBT COMDTINST M16672.2 Rule 9.
12. As directed by the DBT, in accordance with dicta from the Lesser State of
    Washington, debaters must stay at least 400 yards ahead or behind, or 300 yards
    beam of any Southern Resident Orca (SRO). You may approach Transient Orcas
    (TO) within 100 yards (90 meters). If there is any doubt about whether the Orca is a
    SRO as opposed to a TO, it is suggested that you examine their breath, as TOs are
    mammal eaters as opposed to salmon eating SROs and therefore will not smell fishy.
13. As required by the censorious Vice Admiral, the Office of Circumlocution points out
    that the last two items are to be taken seriously. Admiral Jack Tar has meowed his
    assent. The Bilge Rat stands censored.